I love feeling alone
feeling like nobody cares
of understands
or wants to know
I want to go home, with my family, where I belong
I hate everybody that ever hurt me
fuck that
fuck them
I hate my roommates, that's why I get so homesick
that doorm room, it isn't home. I sleep there.
I have no nurturing here, I hate it . I am only 18, I am not used to being on my own
I am 18
I live with an eating disorder
I can't help it
I can't "just stop"
and yeah, I agree, It's stupid
I wish it never happened to me, I wish my life didn't revolve around food or working out or hating myself, but it does. It gets in the way of everything too.
I can't just hang out with my friends, I have to schedule workouts.
And everyone talks about eating disorders like they're nothing, katie fucking makes fun of them
In the beginning of the year, high point put on a skit and it was like "It will never happen to me" they talked about having a roommate with an eating disorder and she kept a spoon in the bathroom. They always make fun of that. I have a deep dark secret only i know, I have a spoon. In my bathroom, so watch what you fucking say .

Maybe I don't belong here, or anywhere.
I want to go home
right
this
very
moment